Get the hell off my porch.

Inspirations are for losers.

Tuesday, December 22, 2009

Bacon Through The Ages

In the Stone Age, meat was a sign of power and physical dominance.
Meat is so great. Why is it so great. It is so tasty.  
Assert yourself as top of the foodchain! King of the Creatures!
 -Baconface, 120000 B.C.
In the Middle Ages, rich people were fat. They also ate much meat.That is all there is to say.
The power as your fangs sever the animal flesh!
The rough brawn you feel as your choppers gnaw on meat!
The carnal desire as you slaughter your victim fresh!
The delight you find in this scrumptious treat!
- Lord Fatté de Baconface, 1442


Having considered the most important historical figures, let's review what we say about meat today:

This cute young fellow reminds me of a mammoth for some strange reason . He shall become rich, fat and powerful. If his heart doesn't give up on him in his 20's.You so tasty!

Carnivores are great. Just look at all these practical applications.

But seriously (rule 412), in the future:
Go vegan. Don't eat fur.

4 comments:

  1. Makes me wonder what you eat in your free time...
    Kids who talk like adults are the funniest!

    valjusha

    ReplyDelete
  2. I do concur (sic!) with the opinions you expressed in your blag entry above, Mr. Dunstable.

    You seem to remember rule no. 33 of the internet: Bacon jokes always work and never get old.

    Jazzmaster

    Post Scriptum: I hope you still do remember rule no. 34 of the internet. It's essential!

    ReplyDelete
  3. Needless to say rule no. 34 applies to bacon above everything else.

    ReplyDelete

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